I call it my "Freaky Forties",
As I turned 40 years old my loving father died, then, only after three years, my dear mother passed away of a broken heart. Two months later, my only child decided he would make me an "empty nester". In my forties, I was lonelier than I could have ever imagined. It was strange to possess a telephone and not to be able to call my parents anymore. I could see through the eyes of my loneliness a silhouette standing on top of the rotating globe ready to scream. It was just me and the Universe.

While my neighborhood was getting ready for Christmas, I was "melting away" slowly. I had to put a stop to it though just because I remembered my Dad loved that Holiday. His last wish before he passed away was that he could fly back and see the December lights along the streets of Vista glittering in his daughter's eyes one more time.

How do I celebrate my Holidays lately?

I put on my walking shoes and run on the hilly streets around my place so my parents could see angels sliding along my eyes during Christmas. How do I celebrate Mother's Day? I park my car next to my secret place - the smallest chapel I've ever seen, open its doors wide but close them quickly so the noisy presence of Highway 78 won't bother the Eternity. One cannot imagine how deeply you can "drown" in the multitude of bouquets of flowers left by the living during Mother's Day in this little secret chapel of mine I found near my house.

Every day is a celebration to me just because I open my eyes and see the Jacaranda trees in bloom around the modern building of the Courthouse on Melrose Avenue, I see my Dachshund saying happily "good morning" by wagging its tail and see names of my best friends on my caller ID.

When I miss being a daughter, I go shopping at Ralphs across the beautiful retirement center on Cannon Drive and see peaceful faces smiling at me. When I need a refreshment course in Foreign Languages o the local mall or the ocean and see, first hand, the melting pot which is so characteristic to my incredible county of San Diego: English, Spanish, German, Russian, Chinese, Vietnamese and even my native Romanian are all the colors that makes Southern California unique.

I guess I am not alone

How do I enjoy my neighborhood?

I just surround myself with the wild beauty of the Vista hills where nightly howls still remind us to be humble once in a while, where good friends stay faithful to our soul and where unforgettable memories of those who can be with us only in spirit dwell in the countless churches in my neighborhood - in the city of Vista.